Me against the world

It is 4:11am and I am wide awake.

I slept earlier from 11pm to 3am. Now at 4, I still can't go back to bed. I am not tired at all. I could try and go back to sleep but I think its a waste of time. I have been staying up late since 2006.

Every night I stay up and think about stuff. What ever is on my mind will be what I think about. For the first few weeks of 2006, I just thought I was homesick as I was in Inuvik NT for college. I then summed up being homesick as, "Missing home because you have nothing to do where you are currently." In Inuvik I had a few friends and I was playing soccer 3 times a week. The College even gave me the keys to open the gym for soccer.

As time passed by, I keep finding myself laying in my bed at 2am wide awake. I always have a lot on my mind. Sometimes I just let my mind wonder and many thoughts go through my mind at night. During the day, I am not tired at all. It seems as I get a full nights sleep. Sometimes in the morning I will think about what I was thinking about the night before. By noon time, I am not thinking about what was bothering me the night before, I just focus on the day. In the evening, I try to relax and not think about anything. But around 12:30 is when I realize that I am thinking again. I can't seem to stop thinking at night. There is just too much that is on my mind.

All through 2007 and 2008, while in college, I had a plan to be in bed by midnight and I even had a routine. It worked for about 1 month then I found myself laying in my bed staring at the ceiling in the dark. In the fall of 2008, I found out something that helps me go to sleep earlier:music.
I don't mean any kind of music, it has to be slow and relaxing. Since I have over 1000 songs stored on my portable hard drive, I select about 25 or so songs and create a playlist and play it on repeat and it helps me to sleep. One song I listen to a lot and helps me sleep most of the time is (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kGzgMy8cQsQ)

Now that I am done school and am currently not working, I find myself staying up as late as 4am. Every time I stay up so late, I always wake up at 1PM.

I have no closing for this entry...